So today the boys went back to school, normality is resumed and the routine is back. I always find this day a funny old day. It’s a day that I always think of Rhianna. That sounds a bit stupid I always think of her, but …
Going on holiday is a fantastic time, I think with most families. But when you are missing a child holidays can be hard. You can be enjoying every single moment of the holiday and then suddenly the realisation that one of your children is missing …
Today we all went for a walk and the boys had a play in the park. It really was for Boo as BB isn’t a great lover of parks but he does it for his brother as he loves it so much. After the park …
You will always be my biggest wonder? The one I dream about. The one I think about. The one I fantasize about. What would you be if you were here? It’s a question I ask myself repeatedly, every single day I don’t ask it to …
What do you see when you look at photos of your children? Do you see laughter, fun, love, your world? I see that too. But I also see a gap. A small gap, where our daughter should be. A gap where their sister should be. …
When you loose a child you hear the saying that you are in a club that you never signed up to be in, but you are in that club forever. And it can be the best worse club in the world, you find support like …
It’s Father’s Day and I would like to be blogging about the beautiful day we have been having. When the truth is it has been a bloody difficult day. It’s been emotional, draining and tiring. The kids have been great at times and then really …
When your daughter lives in heaven days are hard. Special days are even harder. When your the daddy of a daughter or son in heaven they can be even harder. They can be lonely, there can be no support and all the pressure placed on …
Rhianna’s due date isn’t generally a date that floors me. The first year it was hell, it was all so raw, and it was only three months after she died. That was the worst time for her actual due date. Rhianna was due on the …
When Rhianna Lily died the world revolved around me. Where ever we went people asked me how I was, if I was ok, had I eaten, was I sleeping, gave me a hug, sent me messages and kept an eye on me. Mr L was …