Five Years
Five years ago today we announced you to the world At 12 weeks and 3 days it was safe to do so Today it popped up on my memories on Facebook A simple photo and a statement A loaded statement with so many dreams attached …
Rhianna Lily
Rhianna Lily our little girl born sleeping in 2012.
An Angel from the Book of Life
Wrote down my baby’s birth,
And whispered as she closed the book
“Too Beautiful for Earth”
This is Rhianna Lily’s space, her story, and how we carry on living our life without her here with the rest of us!
Stillbirth is…
Stillbirth is hearing the words, ‘we are sorry there is no heartbeat’ Stillbirth is being told there isn’t an option for a caesarean that a natural birth is better for your body and for you. Stillbirth is waiting a few days for a natural labour …
The Start of Year Three and A Missing Child
Last week Baba started year three and there was a significant missing piece this year. I tried my hardest not to let Rhianna being missing to overshadow the day, but it was flipping hard to not let it all be about her. It was a …
Hello Peacock
I have always loved peacocks. Something about a peacock is so magical and amazing. They are stunning, beautiful and magnificent animals and something I am always in awe of when I see them. Since loosing Rhianna they have become more magical. More of a sign …
Rhianna’s Garden
April threw me, I never ever expected to be so upset about the school admissions letters, the one that we missed out on, the one that Rhianna should have had but never got to receive. It floored me, and took me ages to get back …
Fleeting Moment
Four years have passed since Rhianna Lily died, everyday we live our life, and life is good, we are happy, we smile, but we live our life with Rhianna’s fleeting moments. Four years ago seems like such a lifetime ago now. But at the same …
You Turned Four
Six days ago you turned four, six days ago was your birthday. It was a nice day. We got to spend it as a family. We had fun. We smiled. We got to be together. We remembered you. But it has taken me a long …
Four Years On
You would think four years on we would be prepared, we would know it is coming, we would know what to do, we would know what to expect. We don’t. You see the problem is every year is a little different. No year the pain …
Missing You
This hasn’t been the easiest of weeks. It just seems every day is all about missing you, and it is hard. None of it is helped by the fact that I am so tired at the moment. Sleep is minimal and it doesn’t matter what …
The Countdown
Tomorrow is one month until Rhianna Lily’s birthday and the countdown has started. It isn’t a fun countdown, no party planning, no excited child. Instead just a countdown of painful memories, nightmare, tears and pain. Oh so much pain and heartbreak. It changes every year, …