What do you see when you look at photos of your children? Do you see laughter, fun, love, your world? I see that too. But I also see a gap. A small gap, where our daughter should be. A gap where their sister should be. …
When your daughter lives in heaven days are hard. Special days are even harder. When your the daddy of a daughter or son in heaven they can be even harder. They can be lonely, there can be no support and all the pressure placed on …
Rhianna’s due date isn’t generally a date that floors me. The first year it was hell, it was all so raw, and it was only three months after she died. That was the worst time for her actual due date. Rhianna was due on the …
When Rhianna Lily died the world revolved around me. Where ever we went people asked me how I was, if I was ok, had I eaten, was I sleeping, gave me a hug, sent me messages and kept an eye on me. Mr L was …
I hate going to bed the night before your birthday. I hate waking up to silence on your birthday. I hate that there is no excited girl running into our room. I hate there are no presents wrapped downstairs. I hate there are no balloons. …
Seven years today we knew your heart had stopped beating. Seven years today only family and close friends knew our pain. Seven years today we had stopped so many people in their tracks. Seven years today we laid in bed and our phones silently pinged …
For anyone that reads this blog knows that throughout March we always have flowers in our house for Rhianna’s birthday. Yesterday BB chose some more flowers for his sister. He picked flowers I would never have chosen. But ones that are really beautiful. Ones that …
One reason I started to blog about Rhianna was I needed a place, a place to pour out my feelings as I found it so much easier to write than speak. But over the years the reasons I blog about Rhianna remain the same, but …
I strongly believe as a mum we have an invisible connection to our children. Since giving birth to BB and Boo I know if they are ill, or need me. The mother’s instinct. Since loosing Rhianna I don’t think anything breaks that connection. Not even …
This time of year is hard. It is a time of year that we are always ill. And it is a time of year that Mr L and I feel our worse. This month leading up to Rhianna’s birthday is a struggle. We know it …