Today You Should Be…

Today you should be three

But instead you are where you will always be

Up in heaven where you have always been

And we are here trying to make sense of something none of us understand

Today we should be celebrating

Having a toddler in the house

You should be wrapping your daddy round your finger

Screaming at your brothers

Unwrapping your presents

Getting spoilt by all of us

Our only little girl

Turning three

It’s a little milestone

You would be starting playschool soon

Starting your journey of making your own friends

Being independent of mummy and daddy and your brothers

Making your own choices

Instead we stubble through the day

Not really knowing what to do or what to say

Every year is the same

Every year is different

Every year is a ground-hog day

For eternity we have to make less than 24 hrs worth of cuddles last forever

For eternity we have to bumble through the day

Not knowing what we should or shouldn’t be doing

Not knowing whether it’s right or wrong

We stop

We stand

And we fall

Every year we fall

Until our dying days your birthday will make us fall

The day I gave birth

The day the room fell silent

The day you died

It’s all so wrong

The days so wrong

It’s such a blur

We will go to your grave today

We will take you your flowers

We shall have your cake

We shall celebrate you

Because you are our precious little girl

Our only girl

Our princess

And we shall always love you

And we shall always celebrate your birthday

Happy 3rd Birthday Rhianna Lily love Mummy, Daddy, Baba and Boo Xxxx