The First Christmas
It was never going to be easy, we tried our hardest to try not to think about what was in front of us. A lot of December I spent wishing it away completely, as I really didn’t want it here. But there was no stopping …
Tag: Death
Rhianna Lily’s Christmas
This Christmas we wanted something really special for Rhianna Lily, something that was just for her. A tribute in a way. We all wanted something to have for her, something that was special and beautiful for us to see everyday. My sister brought Baba a …
Twenty Third Twenty Fourth
It feels strange to be sat here writing, I haven’t done it in such a long time. Usually when problems arise the first thing I do is run to my pen or my computer and write. But recently I have found the retreating of writing …
Today Is For You
Today the flowers will be bright The colours will be vibrant And our hearts will swell There will be tears, lots of them There will be hugs There will be pain. There will be lots of wonderings Why us? Why you? Why is life so …
The Day Before
Tomorrow we have Rhianna’s debriefing. It is a weird feeling to know that tomorrow is the time when we find out everything that happened or not as the case may be we have been warned that we may not find out anymore information than what …
Rhianna Lily’s Birth Part Two 23/03/2012
This post has taken me a long time to write, I have thought about it a lot, I think about this near on every day but writing it down has been hard. But something that I have wanted to do, needed to do. Part One …
Do You Know
We get asked all the time, “How are you?” We respond with “We are ok considering” “No but really how are you?” “We have good and bad days, but we are getting there” Do you know what that’s a lie We are both fantastic liars Neither …
The Waiting 22/03/2012
Last night was a weird night, Baba was at Mr L’s mum’s as we didn’t want to upset him by suddenly taking him away from there when he knew that he was supposed to be staying. So it was just Mr L and myself. And …
The First Day In Hospital 21/03/2012
I didn’t sleep last night, I tossed and turned all night. Baba crawled into our bed in the early hours and for the first time I just left him there. I just watched him sleep and just cried. I felt so numb, but so bad …
The Dull 20/03/2012
Telling people that your baby has died is probably the hardest thing we have ever done. I remember making the phone calls to relatives and friends when my Nan and Gran died, and I managed to keep it together for those few minutes. I knew …