Rhianna’s Journal

I am a girl that buys a diary every year, with full intentions of keeping a journal. I have loads where a couple of pages are written. But then I stop by February.

I have one that is complete. It has been filled in every inch of every single page all 365 of them!

And it is the year Rhianna Lily died, the year Mr L’s Best Mate died and the year we had a miscarriage.

It’s starts of a joyful diary, full of wonder and excitement and ends in despair and sadness and broken hearts.

It is by far one of the most important things I have ever owned. It is Rhianna’s story all of it and the fact that in another journal I have written from the day I found out I was pregnant her whole life is recorded.

It is harrowing to read.

It is sad.

It is raw.

And it is me screaming from my insides and literally reading mine and our families hearts breaking.

But it is real.

It is her story and one day I will let her brothers read it.

If they want to that is.

If they ever want to really understand their sisters life, and our journey they can it is all there.

And I am so glad I wrote it.

I am so glad I have it.

I am so glad her story is all written down.

If only for me that is all that matters!

Incidentally I haven’t written a journal ever since!!