Since Baba has been to school, he has talked a lot about Rhianna.

She stops his bad dreams, she bites them if they try to get in his room.

I have had to strap her in the car as she is sitting next to him.

Daddy hasn’t been allowed to sit on a spot on the sofa, as Rhianna was sitting there and Baba could see her but Daddy couldn’t.

She goes to school with him everyday, to see how he is getting on.

It’s all little things.

Little statements.

Little moments.

But they all amount to the same thing.

Baba is convinced that Rhianna is with him, all the time.

We can’t judge him on that, and we can’t tell him what is right or wrong.

We can’t say anything, because we can’t be in his head.

It is a strange thing.

Every time he says something it takes you a moment to adjust.

But then you quickly realise that it is actually quite comforting.

It help’s Baba and I love that he doesn’t not think about her, or talk about her.

Although it does take me a moment, a fleeting moment to take in what he has said.

But he isn’t harming anyone.

He is coping.

With a massive thing.

With something that we don’t know how to cope with so how should we tell him, at 3 and 4 years old how to cope with it.

The main thing is, he is coping.

And if that is seeing her, and having her at school, and having her in the car with him.

Then that is fine.

He doesn’t mention it at school.

He doesn’t mention any of this to anyone apart from his Daddy and me.

And if that is what he has to do then so be it.

At least he is coping!

Maybe better than all of us!

But on thing is for certain he seems a lot more at peace with Rhianna than all of us.

And that is all we are bothered about!

If we have to sit somewhere else, and do more car seat belts up then so be it.

That is what we will do.

Until we aren’t told to anymore.

Anything to make sure he is ok and he is coping!

 

How A Child Copes
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