A Family Photo
Today we went shopping, nothing different there.
While we were shopping, we booked a photography session, they were advertising an offer and Mr L mentioned that we have never had a professional, in a studio, photography session with Boo. We did it with Baba, but it isn’t anything we have ever done with Boo.
But it isn’t a simple task of having a lovely family photo any more.
We will never have a family photo.
That really puts me off having family photos.
I love photos, I love photos of Baba and Boo, but there is something that fills me with dread when it includes me and Mr L.
A photo of Baba and Boo, is a picture of the boys, I disguise it as that, I rationalise it as that, in my own head. It makes it ok.
A photo of Baba, Boo, Mr L and myself, is a family photo.
But it isn’t.
It never will be.
In all our years, in every situation we will never have a family photo.
It was one of the reasons I didn’t want formal photos at our wedding.
Our photos are always missing a child.
Always missing Rhianna.
There should be the boys, with a little red-haired beauty in between, instead there is an empty space.
And it makes me dread a family photo.
I am a mum to three children.
I want a photo of all my children.
I will never ever have it.
Not till the end of my days.
There will always be one missing.
They will never be in the same photo, there will never be a picture of all of them.
Never.
And it breaks my heart every single moment a camera clicks.
Or someone gets a family picture.
It will never be complete.
And there is nothing we can do about it.
Hugs my lovely. I think a photo of Rhianna or maybe a little pink teddy would be nice. It’s hard. I feel for you so much. x
Thank you, always grateful for the hugs xx